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Boro v Sunderland 1-0 (Yes we won a game)


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Wow. When my laptop broke down the other week I never imagined I'd end up with the match thread for this "thriller". Also, ignore the poor picture below, my photoshop isn't working so I've crudely knocked it up on MS Paint...

 

 

THE RACE FOR 19TH

 

 

2wfllxc.png

 

 

IT'S THE WOODEN SPOON PLAYOFF!!

 

[align=center]BORO v SCUMDERLAND

[/align]

 

Riverside Stadium. Wednesday 26th April. 19:45.

 

The Form:

 

Absolutely shocking for both teams. 

 

Sunderland haven't won since beating Palace 4-0 at the start of February, scoring 2 goals since then and conceding 16. (Pl 8, W 0, D 2, L 6)

 

Boro's winless league run stretches back to 2016, after an uncharacteristic performance saw us run out 3-0 winners against Brad Bobley's Swansea. There hasn't been much to cheer about since, barring a few FA Cup wins against lower league opposition. "Every cloud" an' all that... (Pl 16, W 0, D 6, L 10)

 

The Opposition:

 

"I'll come to your team and f*ck sh*t up... I'm David Moyes" - Stormzy

 

Perennial relegation fodder that has finally been resigned to the fate they've been flirting with forever. Honestly, Harry Houdini would be proud of some of the escape acts they've pulled over the years.

 

If not for 34 year old Jermain Defoe they'd have been down in November.

 

Quite possibly the only team in the league whose recruitment can be considered worse than ours. £10m for Borini (I know it's not this season but it's still funny)?? £8m for Djilobodji?? Seriously?!? 

David Moyes came in and signed no less than 7 players from his former clubs (Lescott, Pienaar, Anichebe, Gibson, Oviedo, Love, Mcnair) to add to the hilarity that is Sunderland's transfer dealings. 

 

Possible Line Up?

 

Couldn't even tell you what formation Agnew is going to play, never mind team selection. Guesses on a postcard please (or in the comments.... Y'know, whatever)

 

Chuckle-Chuckle-Vision

 

Will post the video once Aggers has had his press conference. For now, here's a picture of him that's been amusing me on twitter. I don't think it's been doctored but I could be wrong...

 

C-BrIr_W0AQLmVk.jpg:large

 

View From The Otherside

 

Doesn't appear to be one up on RTG yet but I'll link it when it appears as it's sure to be a great read. If you can understand what they're saying that is, for some reason Mackems seem to love to type in their regional dialect.

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Nice job on the MDT.

 

I think we'll lose to Sunderland and end up bottom. (I did stay positive for a long time) :D

 

I hope Hull stay up and not Swansea. Given the turmoil that Hull have been in since the summer, it will be utterly remarkable if they manage to stay up. They only had nine first team players a week before the season started!!

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Nice job on the MDT.

 

I think we'll lose to Sunderland and end up bottom. (I did stay positive for a long time) :D

 

I hope Hull stay up and not Swansea. Given the turmoil that Hull have been in since the summer, it will be utterly remarkable if they manage to stay up. They only had nine first team players a week before the season started!!

 

We better bloody not!  Wednesday is when we salvage a little bit of pride and win a league game for the first time in months.

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Good job with the match day thread omg! You put more effort in than the players on Saturday did.

 

Would be good to do the double over Sunderland. It would be a very dim light in a season of dark.

 

 

I reckon Agnew will go back to basics with an incredibly complicated 23221 formation that the players have never tried, or indeed heard of before.

 

-----------Guzan------------

------Gibson----Ayala-------

--Clayton--Deroon--Forshaw---

--Traore------------Fischer--

------Negredo--Gestede-------

----------Bamford------------

 

All players will be asked to attack aimlessly at any and all opportunities, even if it costs us many goals conceded. This tactic will be known as 'the charge of the sh**e brigade'

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Since a draw is basically now a win for us that would be great just so we can say we did not lose to Sunderland this season (yes that is hollow victory)

 

........................Dimi...................

Fabio........Fry.......Gibson,,,,,,Friend

Adama..Foreshaw..Leadbitter.Downing

.............Gestede..Bamford.................

 

Build for next year by starting to get read of players that are off at the end of the season (apart from (Gibson and Fabio) and defiantly get red of any player that doesn't give a monkey about this club anymore from the starting 11. This team might actually get something from the Sunderland game and if not try their best not put in a half a.sed performance.

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Since a draw is basically now a win for us that would be great just so we can say we did not lose to Sunderland this season (yes that is hollow victory)

 

........................Dimi...................

Fabio........Fry.......Gibson,,,,,,Friend

Adama..Foreshaw..Leadbitter.Downing

.............Gestede..Bamford.................

 

Build for next year by starting to get read of players that are off at the end of the season (apart from (Gibson and Fabio) and defiantly get red of any player that doesn't give a monkey about this club anymore from the starting 11. This team might actually get something from the Sunderland game and if not try their best not put in a half a.sed performance.

 

But you've selected Downing.

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Since a draw is basically now a win for us that would be great just so we can say we did not lose to Sunderland this season (yes that is hollow victory)

 

........................Dimi...................

Fabio........Fry.......Gibson,,,,,,Friend

Adama..Foreshaw..Leadbitter.Downing

.............Gestede..Bamford.................

 

Build for next year by starting to get read of players that are off at the end of the season (apart from (Gibson and Fabio) and defiantly get red of any player that doesn't give a monkey about this club anymore from the starting 11. This team might actually get something from the Sunderland game and if not try their best not put in a half a.sed performance.

 

But you've selected Downing.

 

I think downing does care but doesnt have the quality anymore tbh hes a championship player now i would have said. Having said that would not be upset if Friend played left wing and Husband played Lb to give him a chance against Sunderland. I just want everyone to want to beat Sunderland rather than a ticking off exercise for games left that they are here.

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For the first time in my life I'm wondering whether a defeat might be the best thing for the club long term.

 

I wouldn't be surprised if a win against Sunderland is enough for Steve Agnew to get the job next season, then the club and Gazette can spin the line of what a great manager he is until the end of the season.

 

As for the game I'd expect about 7 changes and a different formation as coco the clown puts the players names into the random generator again.

The result could be anything from a 3-0 win to a 3-0 defeat as both sides are equally atrocious.

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I see Downing has come out in praise of Agnew saying he should have the job next season. Anyone else read that as ruthless self interest, in that it can be read that I have more chance to keep my place if he is in charge and my best mate is on the coaching staff /

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I see Downing has come out in praise of Agnew saying he should have the job next season. Anyone else read that as ruthless self interest, in that it can be read that I have more chance to keep my place if he is in charge and my best mate is on the coaching staff /

 

Exactly this. Agnew has brought in his bezzie mate and starts him every game. No wonder the pleb wants him to stick around. Lets just ignore the fact he hasn't won a single match and we've looked even worse than when Karanka was in charge which is a achievement.

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