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Boro v Cardiff City 0-1


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Are your expensive signings not working as a team?

 

Are you slow, sluggish and unable to start games with purpose?

 

Has any semblance of a decent defence gone out the window?

 

 

 

Well, fear not, because the solution is here! 

YmiQN2L.jpg

Yes, from the Garry Monk lab it's the new Boro Team Gel. Within just 4 or 5 months you may or may not start to see signs of improvement in your stuttering performances. Your players will start games like they actually realise the referee has blown the whistle, and your defenders will not only pick up their men, but they will stay with them!

The results really are instant. I can't promise they will be good, but they will be instant.

But don't take my word for it, let's see what some of our satisfied customers have to say:

 

"I thought I had to go to all the way to Birmingham to get a team gel, but Garry Monk has sorted me right out!"   - S. Downing, Middlesbrough

 

"I genuinely didn't know what was going on, but since I tried Garry Monk's Boro Team Gel, I have a slightly marginally better idea" - A. Clayton, Harrogate

 

"When does it go on sale? And what time do I need to get there in time to buy it?" - A. Traore, Wynyard

 

"Wonder what the main ingredient is...snake oil? Ha ha ha, get it? SNAKE?" - A. Bitterman, Leeds

 

So remember, if results are going to improve, you need Garry Monk's Boro Team Gel. Apply as quickly as possible, and hope for the best! Yours for a bargain £50m!

 

Please complete our customer survey below:

Do we change anything?

Does Traore deserve/need to come back into the squad? 

How would another poor home result affect Monk's future?

How do we combat the slow starts?

Are there any really obvious puns I've missed? 

 

 

 

 

*Allegedly

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Hahaha! That's mint mate well done!

 

Big game, tough game. A win here in any fashion would do, wouldn't expect us to blow away Cardiff but a win would give us the confidence.

Huge.

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Do we change anything? The manager

 

Does Traore deserve/need to come back into the squad?  Yes

 

How would another poor home result affect Monk's future? Must win or he's out.

 

How do we combat the slow starts? Sack Monk

 

Are there any really obvious puns I've missed? Don't think so!

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Wether I'd pick traore would be dependent on what he's done in training this week and not what he did on sat

Put the players watches back ten mins then they'd all come good at ko

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Fletcher out, Bamford in. Other than that, I wouldn't change a thing.

 

On the evidence of Saturday, we don't need Traore in the squad. It's clear that our best moves on Saturday were formed from good, intelligent passing, not pace. Surely the only way he comes into the team is if he's replacing Downing which would be a horrendous decision on the back of his performance. I wouldn't be against him being in the squad, I certainly wouldn't put him in the starting XI. Same goes for Johnson if he's fit again.

 

I don't think it will make one jot of difference at this stage. The boo boys will be out in force ready to jump on him for every wrong move we make though, no doubt. As Duvel has already hinted at, he wants him sacked now as well as as a result of picking up less than 3 points against Cardiff. I sincerely hope there aren't 20,000+ Duvels in the stadium.

 

For a start, having kick-off would be good. And keeping a hold of the ball for the first 5 minutes. We don't need to look at starting so fast. That's what the opposition wants us to do, it's painfully obvious when we're most vulnerable, so we'd give ourselves a bit of help by just playing to keep the ball for the opening period of the game, maybe sit a bit deeper in the first 5 minutes, reign Fabio and Christie in a bit.

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That’s a better opening than we’ve seen from the Boro in the last few games Tom, top work!

 

Do we change anything? No we keep changing things, that’s part of the problem.

 

Traore? See above

 

Monks future? He’ll be fine for a few more months at least.

 

Slow starts? Keep the ball.

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Great opening, best one for a while!

 

Do we change anything?

- No.. experiment time is over and we just need to stick with a team and let them get used to playing together. Only change I would make is Bamford for Fletcher. Personally I would have Gestede when he's back over Fletcher too.

 

Does Traore deserve/need to come back into the squad?

- Yes on the bench as an impact sub. He messed up and has been punished, lets move on.

 

How would another poor home result affect Monk's future?

- Groans from the fans... but as long as he's a few wins off the play-offs I can't see any genuine threat of the sack.

 

How do we combat the slow starts?

- Keep the ball. Make the first 10 boring and shut the opposition fans up.

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Great opening, best one for a while!

 

Do we change anything?

- No.. experiment time is over and we just need to stick with a team and let them get used to playing together. Only change I would make is Bamford for Fletcher. Personally I would have Gestede when he's back over Fletcher too.

 

Does Traore deserve/need to come back into the squad?

- Yes on the bench as an impact sub. He messed up and has been punished, lets move on.

 

How would another poor home result affect Monk's future?

- Groans from the fans... but as long as he's a few wins off the play-offs I can't see any genuine threat of the sack.

 

How do we combat the slow starts?

- Keep the ball. Make the first 10 boring and shut the opposition fans up.

 

exactly like we did at the start of the second half on saturday. think monk might have mentioned it a little in the half time roasting ha ha

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Ha. Like it Tom. Here's hoping for a slick performance!

 

 

Do we change anything? I'd stick. By most accounts it was a decent performance the other day, just need to stop being so sloppy at the back and we'll have cracked it.

 

Does Traore deserve/need to come back into the squad? I'd have him on the bench.

 

How would another poor home result affect Monk's future? It's all part of the master plan...

 

How do we combat the slow starts? Start quickly!

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Good questions asked Tom -

Do you change anything?

Yes but not drastically you tweak not change the whole squad and tactics.

Does Traore deserve/need to come back into the squad?

No he does not deserve to start, as a manager if u let him start the next game it will indicate to the rest of the squad that what he did on Saturday was ok and you can get away with that.

How would another poor home result affect Monk's future?

Pressure from the fans will mount but steve gibson wont sack someone until theyve had a season in charge i reckon.

How do we combat the slow starts?

You press high up the pitch early to get on the front foot and defensively you dont take any chances in the first 15 even if means booting it up the field just to take the pressure off.

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Still feel like we're yet to put in a complete performance from front to back. Hopefully the team can get up for this one, as many leaders on the pitch as possible. Think the only change I would make would be Fletcher for Bamford/Johnson. With Traore on the bench. A consistent formation and teamsheet will stop us starting so slow.

 

I think the difference between us and Wolves has been that they bought players (high quality ones too) who were used to playing their current style of possession football and have got off to a flyer. We've bought a lot of quality Championship players from teams that play different styles who are still learning to play Monk's brand of football.

 

I haven't given up on automatic promotion yet, but I've dialled down my expectations a bit. I'm not a fan of Managerial changes midway through the season, especially if there's no one to come in straight away. I'd much prefer to let a manager have time to build something than be trigger happy. If we end up in the play offs at the end of the season having shown some consistency and real promise at points, then I would be in favour of keeping Monk for next season, if he finishes outside of the playoffs then he's definitely got to go.

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Great opening, best one for a while!

 

Do we change anything?

- No.. experiment time is over and we just need to stick with a team and let them get used to playing together. Only change I would make is Bamford for Fletcher. Personally I would have Gestede when he's back over Fletcher too.

 

Does Traore deserve/need to come back into the squad?

- Yes on the bench as an impact sub. He messed up and has been punished, lets move on.

 

How would another poor home result affect Monk's future?

- Groans from the fans... but as long as he's a few wins off the play-offs I can't see any genuine threat of the sack.

 

How do we combat the slow starts?

- Keep the ball. Make the first 10 boring and shut the opposition fans up.

 

exactly like we did at the start of the second half on saturday. think monk might have mentioned it a little in the half time roasting ha ha

 

You would hope so! We're a bit of a scalp this season... not helping at all to keep giving home fans something to cheer about and hold on to so early.

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Would anyone put fry back in for this one, he was dropped for a mistake, and having watched the highlights Ayala didn't exactly cover himself in glory for one of their goals, just stuck a lazy leg rather than going in for the ball confidently

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For sure, Ayala gave the ball away that lead to the 2nd goal. Don't think he could have done much about the cross at that point though. I still think he's all round a better defender than Fry and, as shown on Saturday, he causes problems in the opposition box too. Before the mistake, he assisted Braithwaite's goal.

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